Forwarded by rupa at rupa.com (Rupa Schomaker)
From: mattdm at mattdm.org (Matthew Miller)
Subject: Chase customer service
Keywords: original, smirk, true, heard it
Newsgroups: rec.humor.funny
Date: Wed, 30 Apr 2003 19:30:00 PDT
Here's a conversation I just had about my new credit card with a customer
service representative at Chase. It's almost exactly word for word, with no
exaggeration or anything. The last part is awesome.
Me: Hi! I'd like to add an alternate ship-to address to my credit card.
CC: You want that for today?
Me: Well, it doesn't need to be done right away; if it takes a couple of
days, that's okay.
CC: No, it is only good for one day.
Me: What?
CC: We can add an alternate address to your account for one day.
Me: I don't move around that much. Is there any way to add it permanently?
CC: No, sir.
Me: Why not?
CC: We don't do that.
Me: Oh. Well, could you put in a request that this capability be added?
CC: I can add a note to your account, sir.
Me: I meant more of a suggestion-that-someone-might-listen-to sort of thing.
CC: You can write a letter to our correspondence center, sir.
Me: I'm not really interested in writing letters; I just want to make a
suggestion. Is there no way to do that by phone?
CC: You would need to write a letter, sir.
Me: That seems a little inconvenient. Don't you care about hearing what
your customers want?
CC: No, sir. That is why we have a correspondence center.